Fear, you have to destroy it

Fear can conquer anything. After the other day when I had that weird tingling shock, my symptoms have been on the rise. And I have been terrified.
Right now what should be an overwhelming fear is getting close to having to start using a cane then a walker, and then a wheelchair. Or I should be afraid that I can’t even shower alone my wife is do worried I will start twitching and slip and fall and how much more of an inconvenience I am going to become on those who love me.
But I am selfish! My biggest fear wasn’t losing the ability to walk but losing the ability to run. I still have goals to accomplish. They day after next years Cowtown Marathon I don’t care if I ever walk again. I just need to make it to that one day and cross the line. And after doing the full one time, my most selfish dream will be over.
So I just got home from the gym about twenty minutes ago. And I was able to knock out six miles after my incident the other day. In the past year fighting with dystonia, I have at least learned every small victory counts.



About thejollyrunner

There's so much and so little time. The two most important things to know is I suffer from a condition caused Generalized Dystonia and that I love to run. Ironically, two things that don't mix are what now defines me. I have a whole variety of other interests such as my long standing devotion to the Texas Rangers. I am also quite the hunter, fisher, and all around outdoorsman. If I had more time and less dystonia pains, I would fit in more gardening, home improvement, and probably some amatuer astronomy. And lastly, while my life is regrettably being slowed down from the dystonia, I am trying my hand at writing. I have a lot of ideas and it would be nice to see if I have what it takes to create some works worthy of publsihing.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s